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Friday, October 07, 2011

quiet and peaceful

Libby's strength is waning.  This is very hard, but we are so grateful that Libby is comfortable and at peace. This is a vast improvement from confusion and restlessness of Tuesday.  We can't begin to than you for your prayers.

Libby's body seems to be giving up the fight.  Her breathing is more erratic, and her limbs are generally not following orders, but Libby seems to be taking it in stride.  Yesterday afternoon we needed to move Libby to change the sheets. We asked if she could move her arm.  Nothing happen, though you could see concentration of her face.  We gave her time because we knew she wanted to try to do it herself.  After a minute or two she shifted her eyes to us.  I knew that look.  There was sadness but also a slight bit of humor.  When something is so absurd that you have to laugh. I asked "You you want us to help you move".  You could see in the eyes and the most slight nod the answer was "Yes please. The traitorous  arm is not following the orders."  Libby has a little Gumby which she tells me is a reminder "to be flexible". We really need to keep this in mind these days.

Even in the midst of this you can tell Libby is still there and listening. Most of the time she is laying back with her eyes closed. But sometimes something that is said as we share the day with her, maybe reading a note from one of you, or a visitor saying hello, or just reminiscing together as a family, her eye pop open and you can tell that she heard and wants to respond, even if she doesn't have the energy to say anything.  The sweetest thing is watching her face.  Until yesterday afternoon the full smile continued to bloom, though she is losing energy for even that.  Last night when Helen kissed her mom before going to bed you could see the smile in her eyes. Libby's lips only came up on one side but you knew it would have been a smile.  When I said goodnight, she tried to pucker her lips for a kiss. The lips didn't do what she wanted, but the message was clear.  This morning Libby still seems comfortable and is resting.  Her eyes are still loving, though she seems to have lost the strength to smile.

We continue to muddle along.  Folks have dropped off food which has been helpful for two reasons.  The first is that it's hard to get excited about cooking, I would rather be keeping Libby company.  Secondly, Libby is a much better cook that me.  I was reminded of that when I made a small cake this morning. The corners were a bit more crisp than they should be, and the middle was a bit softer than ideal... but it is reasonably tasty in will go well with the Grater's ice cream my mom arranged to be delivered here today.  So it will be cake and ice cream rather than our traditional popcorn when we watch NCIS tonight.

--Mark

Philippians 4:4-7

Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I say, rejoice! Let everyone see your gentleness. The Lord is near! Do not be anxious about anything. Instead, in every situation, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, tell your requests to God. And the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

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